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#24365 - 08/07/06 06:55 AM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke *****
Dokotela Offline
Nkosi
***

Registered: 05/11/04
Posts: 1304
Loc: Emkhathini
Zwangs, ungibulele ngembambo brawami. Ngihleke ngaze ngagxoza indenda. <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/yay.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/gpn.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/banghead1.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/bigcry1.gif" alt="" />

Thumelani izipitshi bangane, mhlawumbe ngingahlukana le stresi namhla.

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#24366 - 08/07/06 09:17 AM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Makhetho Offline
Mafikizolo
*

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 36
Zwangs wangibulala!! Ngithemba ubengelamqondo wokucela lobaba engazi nje ukuthi kunuka njengayo.

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#24367 - 08/07/06 10:29 AM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Golide8 Offline
Sakhamuzi

Registered: 12/02/05
Posts: 75
Loc: madlambudzi
Good wani gaselaomhle. Intellectually stimulating

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#24368 - 08/07/06 11:57 AM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Nomangqika Offline
Ntandokazi
***

Registered: 11/11/05
Posts: 416
Loc: lupane

Subject: Women Types






There are three (3) types of women according to men's perspective.

1. HOUSEWIFE'S

Advantages
* She stays home and takes care of kids and household chores.
* She is always good in bed because she is never tired.
* Will always cook a good meal (NO NANDOS, KFC, etc)


Disadvantages
* You will never know what she does when you are at work.
* She behaves like your mother when you come home late.
* She bitches when you watch TV too long.
* You can't play your music loud.

2. PROFESSIONAL / MILLENNIUM / WORKING - LADIES

Advantages
* She does not need your money
* She can lend you her car (latest model BMW/Volvo), u can boast to your friends that u have a connected Cherrie!! Pssst!!!
---You can even date other women with her car!!!
* She has a credit card and petrol coupon for u when u r down and out.


Disadvantages
* She is generally BAD IN BED. Its either she is too tired or doesn't just feel like it (and u don hav to wonder why we keep more than one of those at a time, BAYASILAMBISA!!!.)

You'll have take-away for dinner 6 times a week (AT LEAST!!)
* She thinks she owns you; more than your mother does sometimes.
* She hates your friends, u can't even go to the stadium once a month.
* She always tells you to get a better job, car, house etc. (the list goes on, COZ SHE MOST LIKELY EARNS MORE THAN YOU DO!!!)
* You won't have a life with this one. They have no respect; they will insult you / your mother in English and French... no gal.


3. GOLD DIGGERS (e.g. Poly Students, UZ,NUST,MSU,SOLUSI,AU, High School students etc etc - generally referred to as Weekend Accessories)


Advantages
* VERY VERY GOOD IN BED (Holy Benjamin - Lord have mercy!!! AKULALWA NDODA,wow!).


Disadvantages
* She makes sure she leaves you penniless. ( airtime, lunch, hair do, cosmetics, etc kutight bafana bami!!!) and then spends the money on her real boyfriend
* She tells you she is on a pill, but she is pregnant within 3 months of the relationship.

*When ever there ' s a misunderstanding, she ' s quick to say youre using her (..but its quite the opposite ( confusion at its best!!! )
* She sues for maintenance costs, especially if you are prominent and takes the story to the Herald,Chronicle,Independent/Mirror....or Sunday Buzz/Trends
* She is sexy isn't she..en that makes many of u? DAMN!!!
_________________________
Its better to lose a lover than to love a loser.

Friends are like shoes. Some are loose and some tight and some fit just right.
They help u as u walk.

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#24369 - 08/07/06 03:43 PM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
hlathi81 Offline
Ndunankulu

Registered: 10/14/03
Posts: 574
Loc: gwanda..
Confession

A parish priest was being honored at a dinner on the twenty-fifth anniversary of his arrival in that parish.

"You will understand," he said as he started his speech, "the seal of the confessional, can never be broken. However, I got my first impressions of the parish from the very first confession I heard here. I can only hint vaguely about this, but when I came here twenty-five years ago I thought I had been assigned to a terrible place. The very first chap who entered my confessional told me how he had stolen a television set, and when stopped by the police, had almost murdered the officer. Further, he told me he had embezzled money from his place of business affair with his boss's wife. I was appalled. But as the days went on I soon realized that my people were not all like that, and I had, indeed come to, a fine parish full of understanding and
loving people."

Just as the priest finished his talk, a leading local politician arrived full of apologies at being late. He immediately began to make his presentation to the assembled crowd.

"I'll never forget the first day our parish priest arrived in this parish," said the politician. "In fact, I had the honor of being the first one to go to him in confession."
_________________________
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before doing any work.

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#24370 - 08/07/06 08:06 PM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
mninimuzi Offline
Nduna
*****

Registered: 08/12/05
Posts: 456
Loc: EMNQAMLEZWENI
A couple was invited to a swanky family masked fancy dress Halloween
party. The wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to
the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she
argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and
there was no need for his good time to be spoiled by not going.
So he took his costume and away he went.
The wife, after sleeping soundly for about an hour, awakened
without pain, and, as it was still early, decided to go to the party.
In as much as her husband did not know what her costume was, she thought
she would have some fun by watching her husband to see how he acted when
she was not with him.
So she joined the party and soon spotted her husband cavorting around
on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could and copping a
little feel here and a little kiss there. His wife went up to him and
being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his new partner high and
dry and devoted his time to her. She let him go as far as he wished,
naturally, since he was her husband. After some more to drink he finally
he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off
they went to one of the cars and had a quickie in the ck seat.
Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home
and put the costume away and got into bed,wondering what kind of
explanation he would make up for his outrageous behaviour. She was
sitting up reading when he came in, so she asked what kind of time he
had. "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when
you're not there."
Then she asked, "Did you dance much?" He replied, "I'll tell you, I
never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Bill Brown
and some other guys, so we went into the spare room and played poker all
evening."
"You must have looked really silly wearing that costume playing poker
all night!" she said with unashamed sarcasm. To which the husband
replied, "Actually, I gave my costume to your Dad. Apparently he had a
marvelous time."
_________________________
Masiyephambili!
To err is humane..But when the eraser wears out ahead of the pencil,you are overdoing it.
lgeja libuya nenkankula

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#24371 - 08/07/06 09:33 PM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Makhetho Offline
Mafikizolo
*

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 36
ha ha ha ha mnini!!! yini eyenzakalayo lapho? Umhlola lowo.

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#24372 - 08/07/06 09:37 PM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Makhetho Offline
Mafikizolo
*

Registered: 06/14/06
Posts: 36
Oooops Hlathi!!! Poor politician.

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#24373 - 08/08/06 07:22 AM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
MaJamela Offline
Ngqwele
*****

Registered: 10/04/05
Posts: 145
Loc: Emaguswini
Mnini, <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/yelclap.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/yelclap.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/yelclap.gif" alt="" /> <img src="/ubbthreads/images/graemlins/yelclap.gif" alt="" />
_________________________
I'm not African, I'm from Bulawayo. Learn the difference!

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#24374 - 08/08/06 01:50 PM Re: Re: Imbambo az' yephuke
Nomangqika Offline
Ntandokazi
***

Registered: 11/11/05
Posts: 416
Loc: lupane
Rumours has it that Gono has dropped the last digit on the President's age meaning when he wakes up tommorrow he will be 8.


Edited by Nomangqika (08/08/06 02:32 PM)
_________________________
Its better to lose a lover than to love a loser.

Friends are like shoes. Some are loose and some tight and some fit just right.
They help u as u walk.

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