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#24054 03/15/06 01:21 AM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 281
Sikhulu
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Sikhulu
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 281
<img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" />

#24055 03/15/06 09:21 AM
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 113
M
Ngqwele
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Ngqwele
M
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 113
why do women sound like an ambulance?
akulamklomelo yokuthola impendulo eqondileyo

#24056 03/15/06 10:35 AM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,304
Nkosi
***
OP Offline
Nkosi
***
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 1,304
Quite a number actually

- they come quickly
- you have to enter, mainly from behind.
- when they move they do not want any hurdles.
...

#24057 03/15/06 01:11 PM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 201
N
Sikhulu
Offline
Sikhulu
N
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 201
For everyone who has ever had an evaluation - just remember, it could have been worse. These are actual quotes taken from recent employee performance evaluations kuCivil Service yakhona le kithi eMzimatshe.

1. "Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."

2. "I would not allow this employee to breed. Zibenzi chairo"

3. "This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more
of a definite won't be."

4. "Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like
a rat in a trap."

5. "When he opens his mouth, it seems that it is only to change
feet."

6. "This young lady has delusions of adequacy."

7. "He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails
to achieve them."

8. "This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."

9. "This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts the
better."

10. "Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it
all together."

11. "A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary
ignoramus."

12. "He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."

14. "I would like to go hunting with him sometime."

15. "He's been working with glue too much."

16. "He would argue with a signpost."

17. "He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."

18. "When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."

19. "If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the
other one."

20. "A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."

21. "A prime candidate for natural de-selection."

22. "Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."

23. "Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train
isn't coming."

24. "He's got two brains cells, one is lost and the other is out
looking for it."

25. "If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a
week."

26. "If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get
change."

27. "If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."

28. "It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."

29. "One neuron short of a synapse."

30. "Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only
gargled."

31. "Takes him 2 hours to watch 60-minutes."

32. "The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead.

#24058 03/15/06 10:04 PM
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 281
Sikhulu
Offline
Sikhulu
Joined: Jan 2005
Posts: 281
AKELINGIYANGISE LINGITSHELE SIBILI,AMA JOKES LAWA NGAWENU KUMBE LIYEBA,NCEDANI BO, NGITHOLE INKALAKATHA YOMGODI WAWO NXA LISEBA KHULUMANI LAMI NGIHLE NGIZE NGOKUSHESHA,HK HK.NGIKHATHELE NGEMBAMBO EZITSHONA ZIBUHLUNGU NGOBA AMA JOKES ENGIWABONA LAPHA SURREND SIBILI SENGAHLEKA ISILAKALAKA SAZE SAKHALALA UKWENZA UMSEBENZI WASO OYIWO.KEEP THE JOKES COMING <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" /> <img border="0" alt="clap" title="" src="graemlins/yelclap.gif" />

#24059 03/16/06 10:04 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 805
Ndunankulu
Offline
Ndunankulu
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 805
3 good manners of male penis.

1)Courteous-it stands before performing.

2)Emotional-it cries during the performance.

3)Polite-it bows down after the performance.

#24060 03/16/06 10:08 AM
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 805
Ndunankulu
Offline
Ndunankulu
Joined: Sep 2004
Posts: 805
A girl phoned me the other day and said..."Come on over, there's nobody home." I went over. Nobody was home

#24061 03/16/06 08:43 PM
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 250
Sikhulu
*****
Offline
Sikhulu
*****
Joined: Nov 2003
Posts: 250
Itshabi libhalela itshAbikazi incwadi yothando::

Dear my habhurosi
Thanks plenta for yours that reached me a couple
of days ago,
here I
am
doing fine through I miss you so much like maize
miss water in
a drought.Here life is half half like carrying
of a donkey.Shaaz
you are rough like a bed of mapuranga, the last
time I writting
you
you not replied my mail why why why. I was made
at you for sure
but i
still love you.I want you to be the mother of my
children and I
want
to
give you happy when I closing schools for
holiday . Love without
romance
is
like tea without sugar so I cant wait to open
that tin of jam
between
your
legs, that day fornication will take place and
the grass will
suffer.You
telling me last year that you are still a virgil
and I sleeping
with
you
first time some people say it painful and blood
omes out,
but you know am strong such that even it painful
I won't cry and
you
not
cry too but if it too painful we will crying
hand in hand. I know
my
thing
wants it coz that day when I kissing you kuma
one room my thing
elected
and
was wanting to have some funnies but I not have
condoms
so I forgetting it but my testicles were paining
when you go.I
asking
a
friend and he tells me it happens if you dont
having sex after
touching
darling I willl die if I think of living without
you because you
are
replacable, without you i can't go on. Everytime
I see you my
heart
goes
ka
boom with happing.If I come home I will save
money and
bought you a dress I see at power sales then go
with you for a
honey
moon
by the river where we looking at naked people
bathing in the
river.I
have
to run to books for they are calling me to read
them Say hie to
all
your
friends especially that girl we meeted at the
shops with pink
tenderfoot
shoes and green trousers. I have to go and
please pliz please
purizi
reply
my mail or I will died.

Loved always
Sweetwell Mudapakati

Special dedications
uri roja - exra large
the blair that i know
roy and rice - handirege

#24062 03/16/06 10:16 PM
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 81
Sakhamuzi
Offline
Sakhamuzi
Joined: Nov 2002
Posts: 81
Nhai dai ngoma dzaigadzirwa neganda rebeche pane yaibvaruka here, snooker ichitambwa nemboro ndiyani ayitadza kusinker?

#24063 03/22/06 12:51 PM
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 517
Ndunankulu
*****
Offline
Ndunankulu
*****
Joined: Aug 2005
Posts: 517
Hallo antie Rhodha

I have a problem and I hope you will redeem me
I am a car thief and dealer in Mbare, who has recently been diagnosed as a
carrier of the HIV virus. My parents live in Mufakose and one of my sisters,
who lives in Mabvuku, is married to a gold smuggler.

My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling
marijuana. They were financially dependent on my two sisters, who are
prostitutes at the Elizabeth Hotel. I have two brothers, one is currently
serving a non parole life sentence at Chikurubi and my other brother is
currently at Remand Prison awaiting his sentence.

I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in
Highfield.

All things considered, my problem is this. I love my fianc? very much and
look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally
open and honest with her.

Should I tell her about my cousin who is an MDC supporter??

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